in th midst of conducting shiatty peachey essays, i chat with indra abt my thots [ brain ] n feelings [ heart ]. i feel like posting it here, simply bcuz im debating as t whether i shud follow my heart or my brain in this 14th fight [ est. thursday 13th ] n our log kinda.. supports.
bt 1st of all, id like t say tht my day ws sure cheerful n splendid =D i dnt rele kno y. i ws a very bad girl in ICT cz i cheated my h/w by using my yr11 essay t hand in cz i ddnt do a proper 1 last nite n in maths i totally felt like an evil person. i sed i wnted t be a delinquent n planned schemes as t how i can get a bad reputation. God, i ws weird. thruout th day i also felt like a positive person n kept thinkin 'im fine, im fine' n u kno wt i rele ws. me n jana laughed a lot in physics cz of stupid things n i measured my height with a stand ruler n got 149cm WTZEHALL THEY LIE. as u all kno i have a bad memory so i cnt quote all th funny things we sed.
even so, despite my smiley n happy self, i still felt something ws missing n tht a part of myself contained grief. i always do. part of my nature.
i dcided t delete th log simply cz i felt like it.
u kno.. it feels rele nice t talk abt things t ppl. i rele miss how me n fajar used t tell each other anything. rele, anything. in fact, just this wednesday he ws talkin t me abt his private feelings. dus he rele have no heart n feelings.. tht he dusnt remember evrything we've been thru?
im nt clinging t him or anything, honest. its just tht.. after i got so down since 2008, he ws always th one ther t bring me back up. im so used t havin him around it seems weird when he's not with me. u can kinda say he's my guardian angel.. wait no way, guardian devil. a mean guy, bt somewt.. 'heroic'.
neverthless, ill just .. let God show me th way..
Otak vs. Hati
Sunday, 16 November 2008
Essay by syania/bs at 6:39 pm
Labels: basic emo, emofajaring, schoolness
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6 replies:
OK THT LOG IS HELL LONG
im gonna read 5 lines perday
or 10.
LOOOOOOL
ITS LONG BT ITS VERY FAST T READ i guarantee u.
|× b i .es - :prasaan prsahabatan orng2 lain normal bgt tau
someitmes i do think like that too. tapi enggak kok bee. kadang2 juga dhe3 suka ngerasa dhe3 doang yang terlalu gimana gimana. tapi bukannya bukan hidup kalo ga ada masalah? kalo ga ada masa2 butuh temen dan ditinggalin temen? we learn from the past. thts how i RE-FORMAT my feelings. :D
my word veri is nousti. ees bee ure naaaasty ! *raven's way*
LOL RE-FORMAT. XDXDDX
see thts y i am not th type t forget th past n just move forward. bcuz i learn t2h
well duh its not life if thers no problems. bt i have problems all th time.. repetitively. SIGH i cnt cmplain rele
i wish fajar has another masa2 of needing a friend.. ME >_____>
okay, i'm with carisa on the HELL LONG chat log.
but i manage to read a bit of it.
okay all of it.
either way, fights happens in life you know and as life goes on people change, drifts apart, get closer for no reason. but if you ask me, i think you both fit with each other but maintainin the flow is hard :\.
add in peer pressure, school life, crushes etc. and it's just a soap opera. but we all had to deal with it sometime 'cuz; it's life.
drama is necessesary to excercise zhe emotions. i think if you went through a big one like this then you can deal with many more to come.
i think i'll stop writing. it's a tad long like your log already. D:
GASP LONG COMMENT ANDIN.
thank u for readin th ntire log XD
hoh.. so so far 2 ppl think we're ccok bt its just cz of how we treat each other. sigh.. i wish thers more time for us both t get better T__T
well luckily i dnt have anymore crushes 8D *just guys t fan over
*nods2* ure rite andin =D i think thts y after all th 13 dramas/fights we've been thru i dnt overreact with this 14th one. ty for th .. hmmh.. advice?
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